#1 November 13th, 2006 09:01 AM

dandy

Member

all hands on the bad one

(...is a really great sleater kinney song)

OK, so i was having this really frustrating conversation with a couple of people yesterday and i would really like the input of intelligant sexually aware people such as yourselves.

Who is the bad person?

Someone who believes in monogomous, long term relationships, looks for and desires that and that alone. And HATES people they deem to sleep around, work in the sex industry, are sexually open, overt and confident. For just those reasons.

Or someone who sleeps around, is sexually over, open and confident, works or does not work in the sex industry etc. who does NOT judge another person based on their sexuality, monogomous long term relationships or no, and would not hold an opposing view to their own against a person.

In fact i wouldnt just say it was monogomous types - i guess its anyone who judges anyone elses sexuality and believes their method is the RIGHT way.

what the fuck is right anyway.

---

sometimes enough is not enough and i want MORE

SCSIgirl

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

(...is a really great sleater kinney song)

OK, so i was having this really frustrating conversation with a couple of people yesterday and i would really like the input of intelligant sexually aware people such as yourselves.

Who is the bad person?

Someone who believes in monogomous, long term relationships, looks for and desires that and that alone. And HATES people they deem to sleep around, work in the sex industry, are sexually open, overt and confident. For just those reasons.

Or someone who sleeps around, is sexually over, open and confident, works or does not work in the sex industry etc. who does NOT judge another person based on their sexuality, monogomous long term relationships or no, and would not hold an opposing view to their own against a person.

In fact i wouldnt just say it was monogomous types - i guess its anyone who judges anyone elses sexuality and believes their method is the RIGHT way.

what the fuck is right anyway.

Dandy,  there are no bad people.  Just backwards people.  There are people who still believe the earth is flat.  There are an astounding number of people who think the world was created in 6 days,  and far too recently for something like dinosaurs to exist.  A recent poll shows about 65% Americans believe in creationism.

A mind boggling number of people think the old way was better.  Science should go away and it's all in our minds.

I view them as the ruts and speed bumps in the road of life.  Ignore them when you can and deal with them when you have to and get to your goal.  It's not the one who gets laid the most,  but the one who gets the most out of her lays that wins.

---

"Apple of my Eye", "bated breath", "brave new world", "caught red-handed" - all coined by Shakespeare.

blissed

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

I think I'd better explain this to anyone who doesn't know.
All hands on the bad one is a hymn oft sung at the Sleater-Kinney Road baptist church "Oh may we all lay hands on the bad one that we may lead him along  the true path to the lord" Dandy went to this particular church to find enlightenment and is now great friends with Pastor Paul and Carolyn Pierce. Dandy has been married for the past 10 years to Nigel Willaby a bicycle mechanic and baptist minister. 

.

maskedman

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

[I] Well. given the two examples you've given.. I'm not sure there is a 'bad person'. I would think it comes down to trust and respect . ..If you promise to one person that you aren't going to play the field and they do the same for you..   then that's very much part of the trust and respect of that relationship... be it marriage or any other partnership. And people know if they've made that promise..be it by voice, oath or action. The question itself puts the answerer in a judgmental position anyway. I've certainly no problem with the guy or girl who plays the field and enjoys themselves... so long as they don't leave a trail of emotional carnage behind them...   That's showing no respect for your partner and that can't be a good thing.  ...Wow...too heavy for me..   So, whens your next set ?

blissed

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

Anyway, yes, When you masterbate if you have no hangups, it's a fulfilling experience in itself, so having an orgasm with someone else you like is usually going to be a nice experience too.  Most  people have lots of friends and a few soul mates and people they have affection for and their trusting and loyal to their friends,  So I think it would be lovely to share yourself openly and honestly with more than one person sexually, as we all do in other ways, without feeling jealous or possessive or egotistical. It's only STD's you have to be mindful of and have good information about what risk level your happy with. Be great if you didn't have to do that tho. I've never had an ilicit affair and I don't want to because it involves deciet and hurting someone, Being open and honest is the important thing  because altho this may sound odd, it's true, but by being Poly and honest,  your being faithful to more than one person at the same time.

.

paintjam

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

(...is a really great sleater kinney song)

OK, so i was having this really frustrating conversation with a couple of people yesterday and i would really like the input of intelligant sexually aware people such as yourselves.

Who is the bad person?

Someone who believes in monogomous, long term relationships, looks for and desires that and that alone. And HATES people they deem to sleep around, work in the sex industry, are sexually open, overt and confident. For just those reasons.

Or someone who sleeps around, is sexually over, open and confident, works or does not work in the sex industry etc. who does NOT judge another person based on their sexuality, monogomous long term relationships or no, and would not hold an opposing view to their own against a person.

In fact i wouldnt just say it was monogomous types - i guess its anyone who judges anyone elses sexuality and believes their method is the RIGHT way.

what the fuck is right anyway.

what is right is what works for YOU as long as you are not harming anyone.
one must be true to oneself....;)

jamie

p.s.  i hate opinionated humans.

---

'stay beautiful'

jackscratch

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

what is right is what works for YOU as long as you are not harming anyone.
one must be true to oneself....;)

jamie

p.s.  i hate opinionated humans.

I'm with you Ms Jamie on the opinionated human beans, but even more the one's who feel the need to impose their own judgment on the rest of us meandering folks. I enjoy watching them hoist themselves on their own petard (see Haggard, Dennis and Foley, Mark for more info..there MUST truly be some devine overseer here).

I differ however on the right wrong thing...for me I must sometimes do what is wrong to discover what is right and perhaps even be untrue to myself, though it has been sometimes harmful and even disatrous a few times. In some places in me life it's the only way to find me way through me own morality and values.

blissed

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

Now that Dandy has converted me to the Baptist faith, I think I take issue with you Jackscratch. You must only do what is right in the eyes of god, which means you must find out what god wants you to do by reading the whole of the bible. Then take some time too think, listen to Christian rock and go to prayer meetings. This will lead you to the true path of the baby Jesus that has stood the test of time (2000 years) and is backed up by hard scientific fact!!! So please take my advice, you know it makes sense.

.

PsychoEddie

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

Now that Dandy has converted me to the Baptist faith, I think I take issue with you Jackscratch. You must only do what is right in the eyes of god, which means you must find out what god wants you to do by reading the whole of the bible. Then take some time too think, listen to Christian rock and go to prayer meetings. This will lead you to the true path of the baby Jesus that has stood the test of time (2000 years) and is backed up by hard scientific fact!!! So please take my advice, you know it makes sense.

.

you must be on crack or legally foolish.  There is NO scientific fact/proof ANYTHING to support christi-anity.  Infact quite the opposite.  As for the bible, it contradicts itself in no less than 100 instances.  Could god not make up his/her mind, or is the bible so much codswallop like scientology?  Now, you claim to be a baptist.  I've studied theology for fifteen years now.  Tell me the difference between a baptist and a christi-an?

PsychoEddie

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

I'm with you Ms Jamie on the opinionated human beans, but even more the one's who feel the need to impose their own judgment on the rest of us meandering folks. I enjoy watching them hoist themselves on their own petard (see Haggard, Dennis and Foley, Mark for more info..there MUST truly be some devine overseer here).

I differ however on the right wrong thing...for me I must sometimes do what is wrong to discover what is right and perhaps even be untrue to myself, though it has been sometimes harmful and even disatrous a few times. In some places in me life it's the only way to find me way through me own morality and values.

There is  no right.  There is no wrong.  There is no good.  There is no evil.  There is only "different" and the inability to understand it.

Head

Administrator

Re: all hands on the bad one

you must be on crack or legally foolish.  There is NO scientific fact/proof ANYTHING to support christi-anity.  Infact quite the opposite.  As for the bible, it contradicts itself in no less than 100 instances.  Could god not make up his/her mind, or is the bible so much codswallop like scientology?  Now, you claim to be a baptist.  I've studied theology for fifteen years now.  Tell me the difference between a baptist and a christi-an?

um, I think he was taking the piss...

blissed

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

Lol

blissed

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

Now, you claim to be a baptist.  I've studied theology for fifteen years now.  Tell me the difference between a baptist and a christi-an?

Baptists have big hats but Christians have better jumpers.

.

jackscratch

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

Personally I take my guidance from the tea leaves that I read in the bottom of my cup each morning. Then when I'm presented with a moral decision, I spit in my hand and slap it to see which way it flys. Right means yes, left means no. I think this is how yaweh speaks to me...PS I just wish the voices would stop soon, or least speak more in unison. PS The advice you've given Blissed is pretty much what I would expect....

Belgareth

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

what is right is what works for YOU as long as you are not harming anyone.
one must be true to oneself....;)

jamie

p.s.  i hate opinionated humans.

Your post script prevents me from commenting upon this topic, as I rather not inflame your hatred :-D

---

[color="Red"]require "help.pl";[/color]

paintjam

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

Your post script prevents me from commenting upon this topic, as I rather not inflame your hatred :-D

ouch!  teehee
jamie

---

'stay beautiful'

paulie_09

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

ALL relationships create social problems. But the only thing wrong is running from a problem.

paintjam

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

ALL relationships create social problems. But the only thing wrong is running from a problem.

yes
never give up
never surrender....;)

---

'stay beautiful'

paulie_09

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

yes
never give up
never surrender....;)

LOL ! I see I forgot to say "running from your own problems.

blissed

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

Personally I take my guidance from the tea leaves that I read in the bottom of my cup each morning. Then when I'm presented with a moral decision, I spit in my hand and slap it to see which way it flys. Right means yes, left means no.

I think you need one of these, just keep throwing it until you get the right answer

.

dandy

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

i totally didnt know that was the origin of the band name... and where can i get one of those dice? (i totally over paper scissors rock for my major life decisions)

some interesting opinions circulating, opinionated people suck i agree, i have a tendancy to be opinionated most of the time and it is definately not a characteristic i like about myself.

hence, i was going to come here and say there was most definately a right and most definately a wrong, but that would just be me being opinionated; wouldn't it? And since im trying to beat it out of myself, lets not go there, all your points have been correct, to an extent. There are princliples which conduct all of our lives and should be considered wrong if violated. Violation of human rights is always to be condered wrong i think, denial of womans rights, childrens rights freedom of speech etc.

the aforementioned topic is i guess in that idea of people have a right to their own opinions, but GOD do people with sucky opinions piss me off.

---

sometimes enough is not enough and i want MORE

suidroot

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

thanks

zille

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

the aforementioned topic is i guess in that idea of people have a right to their own opinions, but GOD do people with sucky opinions piss me off.

And, I would imagine that "GOD-people with sucky opinions" piss you off even more!  [grins]

You know I'm of the same mind as you on these matters, Dandy.

Anyone who tries to foist their beliefs off on other people (unless those people have specifically requested the information) is in some ways a bad person.  People have the right to figure things out on their own, to think their own thoughts, to follow their own path.  (Happily, being a bad person, in this case, is not incurable.  You could just stop trying to make other people think they way you want them to.  Which, in the end, is the far easier thing, anyway!)

Being monogamous and close-minded is fine for people to choose -- for themselves!  (Not that those neccesarily go togther.  My boyfriend and I are mostly monogamous these days, with the exception of being able to flirt and make-out with cute girls we like.  My little sister has always been monogamous with all her boyfriends and she seems perfectly fine with that.)

Being poly and doing sex-work and being kinky, and all that stuff are also also perfectly fine and valid for people to choose -- but again, only for themselves!  Just because something makes you happy doesn't mean it would make other people happy.  I mean, I love to get my ass spanked (and "worse") by my boyfriend.  But, for reasons of their own, other girls are squicked out by the very thought of it.  Yes, some are probably just saying, "Ewww that's gross/wrong/sick/just not for me without even trying it.  But it's their lives to live.

I always thing a good way to look at things is this:  If there is something you like to do, and it doesn't harm anyone else, go for it in good concious, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.  Oscar Wilde said "There is no sin except stupidity," and I have to go with him on that!

---

~See more of me at http://zilledefeu.com

blissed

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

where can i get one of those dice?

Note to self: If their still in the shop buy a dice  and send it to Feck.
ask Max or Jeanie if they'll keep it for Dandy in reception to pick up if she wants to.
Merry Christmas

.

pia

Member

Re: all hands on the bad one

(...is a really great sleater kinney song)

OK, so i was having this really frustrating conversation with a couple of people yesterday and i would really like the input of intelligant sexually aware people such as yourselves.

Who is the bad person?

Someone who believes in monogomous, long term relationships, looks for and desires that and that alone. And HATES people they deem to sleep around, work in the sex industry, are sexually open, overt and confident. For just those reasons.

Or someone who sleeps around, is sexually over, open and confident, works or does not work in the sex industry etc. who does NOT judge another person based on their sexuality, monogomous long term relationships or no, and would not hold an opposing view to their own against a person.

In fact i wouldnt just say it was monogomous types - i guess its anyone who judges anyone elses sexuality and believes their method is the RIGHT way.

what the fuck is right anyway.

yeah the way this question is posed (as well as my own experiences of the world) kind of makes me feel like the obvious answer is that the sleeping around unjudgmental person is the goody and the other is the baddy. But i dont think that in real life there are goodies and baddies or right and wrong. Everyone just has a different story and a different opinion - and we all think that our opinions are the right ones .. otherwise we wouldnt have them would we. Here is a quote that i had written on my folder in high school "there are as many worlds as there are minds because each mind lives in it own world"