#1 April 1st, 2005 11:23 AM

amber_rose
Member

Curious

Hi. I guess this question is hardly a new one, but it is certainly one that i have been asking myself recently, particularly because of sites like ISM

What is 'sexy'? what is 'beautiful'? Is it something that can be defined? Is there one popular idea that most people out there would agree upon? Or is it completely random?

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#2 April 1st, 2005 01:51 PM

Torture_Garden
Member

Re: Curious

I don't know that there is a universal defintion of the terms that can be clearly defined. All that I can offer in regard is a personal opinion on what works for me... works? That's a crap term, sorry but it'll have to do for the moment.

A woman that is sure of herself and confident in the things that shes does (not in an arrogant sense), is definitely sexy in my books. The women on here are sexy. To take control of the camera and medium to create a series of personalised images is admirable and I would imagine, empowering! I like that. Asides, there is the attraction factor; that all-encompassing mind, body, looks combination that gets factored into the equation as well. Beauty, I think comes almost entirely from within a person in the way they act, interact, beliefs, morals et al...

That's just me and hell, I'm just a boi with an overprotectve Mommy


James
--
...and when the day arrives I'll become the sky and I'll become the sea and the sea will come to kiss me for I am going home...

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#3 April 1st, 2005 03:42 PM

liandra_dahl
Member

Re: Curious

amber_rose wrote:

Hi. I guess this question is hardly a new one, but it is certainly one that i have been asking myself recently, particularly because of sites like ISM

What is 'sexy'? what is 'beautiful'? Is it something that can be defined? Is there one popular idea that most people out there would agree upon? Or is it completely random?

I think it's neither definable or completely random. This is far from novel as an answer but someone who you find physically repulsive could have the most beautiful/ sexy mind, voice, laugh and vice versa. It's a pity that we're more likely to put up with a twisted ugly mind for the sake of physical appearance than we are to put up with physical defects for the sake of beautiful cerebal or emotional qualities. There isn't a universality of beauty stretching out across all divides. There is a recognisable mainstream ideal in western culture that is distinguishable as having a few set basic characteristics, but there are many varitions and many who just plain defy all catagorization in their acclaimed beauty. "beaty is in the eye of the beholder" is a cliche but a cliche only becomes a cliche because it's so true.

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#4 April 1st, 2005 03:44 PM

liandra_dahl
Member

Re: Curious

amber_rose wrote:

Hi. I guess this question is hardly a new one, but it is certainly one that i have been asking myself recently, particularly because of sites like ISM

What is 'sexy'? what is 'beautiful'? Is it something that can be defined? Is there one popular idea that most people out there would agree upon? Or is it completely random?

I think it's neither definable or completely random. This is far from novel as an answer but someone who you find physically repulsive could have the most beautiful/ sexy mind, voice, laugh and vice versa. It's a pity that we're more likely to put up with a twisted ugly mind for the sake of physical appearance than we are to put up with physical defects for the sake of beautiful cerebal or emotional qualities. There isn't a universality of beauty stretching out across all divides. There is a recognisable mainstream ideal in western culture that is distinguishable as having a few set basic characteristics, but there are many varitions and many who just plain defy all catagorization in their acclaimed beauty. I hate to  use such a tired phrase but "beaty is in the eye of the beholder". It is a rather dreary cliche but a cliche only becomes a cliche because it's so true.

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#5 April 1st, 2005 04:36 PM

Violex_Kitty
Member

Re: Curious

<P>It's 100% personality.  Looks certainly do help, but everyone has seen the stunning model with not much else upstairs - which is not to say that it's all about intelligence, either (although it's a big one for me).  We're all vessels - different makes and models - but it really depends on who is driving the beautiful machine, to really make it glow.
<P>The artists on ISM who smile, or wink, or express their very selves through one knowing glance, so that it is absolutely obvious what is on their mind - that's sexy.  Confidence helps, but that confidence also stems from knowing themselves, and being happy with who they are.
<P>Okay, so i've gone a little bit hippy on you all so i'll tone it down a notch.  Um...big breasts?

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#6 April 1st, 2005 04:40 PM

Violex_Kitty
Member

Re: Curious

It's a pity that we're more likely to put up with a twisted ugly mind for the sake of physical appearance than we are to put up with physical defects for the sake of beautiful cerebal or emotional qualities.

liandra, you said what I had meant to say in perfect terms. 

And it's also a pity how very common this inclination is, especially in today's society.

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#7 April 1st, 2005 05:11 PM

minoskb
Member

Re: Curious

comfort in your own skin. i've never met a girl i find attractive who doesn't find herself attractive.

i don't mean that only egomaniacs are attractive: quite the opposite in fact, but quiet confidence is very sexy. there's nothing more magnetic to me than a woman whose eyes, when you catch them, reflect the possibilities that lie behind them. so i guess that's intelligence too, but not necessarily in an overtly academic sense. that's what i love about ism. maybe i'm fooling myself, but it seems to me you get a real window into a woman's character when they photograph themselves. i love most of the sets, but i'm less attracted to the ones where you get the sense that the girl doesn't have the confidence to let herself go, or when she seems to fall back on stereotypes.

physically, i don't have a specific type, though i admit to finding excessive thinness or fatness unattractive. i can't understand all this debate about micro aspects of the way a woman presents herself: who cares about the minutiae of body hair topiary? if that's something that's going to make up a man's mind on a woman, he needs some help.

i'm so MOR. maybe i should start playing golf.

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#8 April 1st, 2005 05:37 PM

Gimme_Danger
Member

Re: Curious

I don't think its possible to say in advance. Any of you can generalise and say what might usually be sexy for you based upon past experience but there's always someone who comes along who breaks all the usual rules.

I couldnt possibly say what turns me on because I find its different from person to person. Initially looks [esp eyes] attract me but then I am looking elsewhere [body and body language] and listening to that person. Self confidence is a factor on both sides too.

I have had relationships with many different looking women and have definitely 'punched above my weight' when my confidence has been high.

So to cap it, eyes first, then it can spin off in so many directions.

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#9 April 1st, 2005 09:15 PM

nagaloo
Member

Re: Curious

It's like this folks and don't try and tell me it's any thing different or you are all fooling yourselves. Its all in that first look never mind what your "thing" is, be it face, ass, tits, slim, voluptuous, scars, something that shocks you or the whole total image of a person. There has to be something to catch your eye that first time. Otherwise you would never get to the inner person at all, to see what's on the inside. That part takes time to see. In the movie "Man Without a Face" Mel Gibson-- the kid Norstat says I dont see the scars anymore-- Not a direct quote LOL. No matter what the person looks like if they are worth knowing the outside features fade with time. And they are total beauty and sexy in your mind.
Stew

PS The funny thing about meeting online through a messenger program, most times you get to know the inside before you see the outside. And I admit it can be a shock sometimes or a holy shit he/she is hot.


The universe is unfolding as it should, and so are the girls on ISM. I love them all.

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#10 April 2nd, 2005 12:17 AM

wantingscott
Member

Re: Curious

i met my wife because i caught her staring at me at a party and i had to find out "what's up with this chick?" plus she had freckles and a unique smile and was very conversationaly funny, so that pretty much did me in.

i'm wondering if maybe amber_rose isn't maybe toying with the idea of "shooting herself". i say do it. you'll probably be very pleased with the results, even if you choose to just keep the pics to yourself...

wscott


_________________________________________________
that's the way it goes. but don't forget, it goes the other way too.

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#11 April 2nd, 2005 05:05 AM

Belgareth
Member

Re: Curious

amber_rose wrote:

Hi. I guess this question is hardly a new one, but it is certainly one that i have been asking myself recently, particularly because of sites like ISM

What is 'sexy'? what is 'beautiful'? Is it something that can be defined? Is there one popular idea that most people out there would agree upon? Or is it completely random?

We have throw a similar thread around previously. For myself, the definition of beauty is a complete package and cannot be broken down into physical, mental and social attributes. Either the whole package works for me or I will discard it without disection. Sexy could possibly be considered a different thing in some ways, depending upon your sexual and sensual triggers but for me to consider someone sexy (or sexually appealing) means they still has to fulfill the other requirements.


[color="Red"]require "help.pl";[/color]

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#12 April 2nd, 2005 07:04 AM

voyeur2
Member

Re: Curious

What is 'sexy'
Almost any woman or man who is in good health and fit - is sexy.  The more they fit the psyco social expectations of the viewer, the sexier they get.  Bits like seeming accessible, seming powerful, wealthy, intelligent, sought after, famous - all contribute to being 'sexy'

Being beautiful does not even need good health, perfect symetry - in fact a certain amount of flaw increases beauty.  Beauty for me has to do with inner grace, calm, expression of joy, happiness, intelligence, acceptance of self, awareness of the world.  Hard to express.  I have seen the beauty of a young woman expressed under the skin and in the eyes of an old woman, flashing out in her quick glance, experienced smile, grace and intelligence not diminished by wrinkles and signs of time passing - rather enhanced by them.  In a young girl I see sometines the woman she will become - a wicked smile, unformed but developing sense of self, grace of body and movement.  The list grows - but how can I say it except by pointing - it is thus, and that not this?


Have I ever lied to you before?

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#13 April 2nd, 2005 07:20 AM

uberkaiser
Member

Re: Curious

amber_rose wrote:

Hi. I guess this question is hardly a new one, but it is certainly one that i have been asking myself recently, particularly because of sites like ISM

What is 'sexy'? what is 'beautiful'? Is it something that can be defined? Is there one popular idea that most people out there would agree upon? Or is it completely random?


                        Your neck, my lips nest
                                has foiled my best
                                   attempts at its essence.
                                      And your S-curve
                                          meandering path swerves
                                             to elude my tongue.
                                                The bulge of your breast
                                                   barricaded, attests
                                                      to my searching caress:

                                                        <i>Disdain.</i>

                                             And yet I persist.
                         For if my advances you resist
           then my efforts have not been in vain.
                          I search not for quickness
                     not for sticky moist slickness
                                                          Not yet.
                                                            Savor the softness
                                                              of our breath.
                                                                The sighs whose natural death
                                                                  I dare not dismiss.
                                                                   The sweetly sundered abyss
                                                                      Of desire deferred
                                                                       whose gist one cannot
                                                                        get,
                                                                         One must be.

                                  In beauty lives the pursuit, not the guarantee.

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#14 April 2nd, 2005 07:52 AM

BillyBear
Member

Re: Curious

amber_rose wrote:

Hi. I guess this question is hardly a new one, but it is certainly one that i have been asking myself recently, particularly because of sites like ISM

What is 'sexy'? what is 'beautiful'? Is it something that can be defined? Is there one popular idea that most people out there would agree upon? Or is it completely random?


It can't be defined. As comedian Gary Mule Deer said. "My Grandpa told me, it's good that we don't all like the same things, otherwise everyone would be after your Grandma."

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#15 June 3rd, 2005 06:39 AM

sweettmolly
Member

Re: Curious

I just became a basic member... not much to do here. Is there more then just one set of pics a day???

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#16 June 3rd, 2005 07:04 AM

wantingscott
Member

Re: Curious

hi molly,
i love socks, too. do you like to peeeeeel your socks away from your heel after a long day on your feet, and then rub your toes w/ peppermint oil? i do...

anyway. for a basic member, there's one set of photos. the rest of the time, we like to shoot the shit on the message board, so basically i spend :45 seconds downloading a folio and, say, 2 hours reading/writing...  the other 5 minutes a day i spend contemplating the Earth's rotation as the sun shines down on a new timezone of sleepyheads who wake up and contribute...

did you know there are 24 timezones...

wscott


_________________________________________________
that's the way it goes. but don't forget, it goes the other way too.

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#17 June 3rd, 2005 08:40 AM

voyeur2
Member

Re: Curious

sweettmolly wrote:

I just became a basic member... not much to do here. Is there more then just one set of pics a day???

For Extra members like me there are several posts a day, and even videos, not to mention the forum.  I spend about an hour a day at it.  Since it takes me 2 hours to read a 10 buck novel it is very cheap entertainment.  And fun.


Have I ever lied to you before?

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#18 June 3rd, 2005 01:57 PM

sweettmolly
Member

Re: Curious

ywa I love to peel my socks away very slowwwwwly. Enjoy my day and play... he he
Thanks for the advice. Let me play for a while first.

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#19 June 3rd, 2005 03:23 PM

SCSIgirl
Member

Re: Curious

Torture's and Lianda's replies both hit it pretty squarely.  The Scuzzy Girl is the sexiest woman I know (I've described her in other posts).

She is not pretty (although to me she is very beautiful)  Most people who meet her for the first time would rate her a 3 or 4 on the proverbial scale of 10.  Yet everyone agrees that she is incredibly sexy.  Women spends billons a year to get what Scuzzy has naturally.

I can't really describe it,  it's in the way she moves,  the way she does things,  the way she talks.  She isn't trying to be sexy,  she just is.  She is confident in what she does, is honest in how she presents herself to you.  She takes her craft seriously and learns all she can about it.  We all love working with her.

I offer this example,  because all the men who work with her and about half the women consider her the sexiest woman.  (The other half of the women can't figure out what the attraction is.)  There have been a lot of discussions about her,  but none can describe it.

None of this answers any questions,  she just is.  Yes, sexiness  (like beauty) is in the eye of the beholder,  but some women just blow everyone away.


"Apple of my Eye", "bated breath", "brave new world", "caught red-handed" - all coined by Shakespeare.

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#20 June 3rd, 2005 10:36 PM

wantingscott
Member

Re: Curious

yes. i know a girl just like that... i used to work with her... she never bathed (hardly) and had the oiliest hair, plus bad skin... at an ad agency in the "bullpen", you get away with ALOT if you are very talented... anyway, she had PERFECT bone structure, posture, and a great sense of denim jeans and black shirts. you got the impression that if she "cared", she would be perfect...  even she knew that she had the best ass in the building AND used to joke to me that on the weekend, she wanted to wear a t-shirt reading "yes, these are my tits"... because of all the staring...   smile


_________________________________________________
that's the way it goes. but don't forget, it goes the other way too.

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#21 June 4th, 2005 01:27 AM

MrPicMe
Member

Re: Curious

I, for one, don't find todays "Artist"sexy. Unshaven with an ass 5x more hairy than mine and what looks like a sour cream discharge I wouldn't describe as anything close to sexy. However, there are those of you out there that will ogle over this set all day...(if you must)

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#22 June 4th, 2005 02:30 AM

Belgareth
Member

Re: Curious

MrPicMe wrote:

I, for one, don't find todays "Artist"sexy. Unshaven with an ass 5x more hairy than mine and what looks like a sour cream discharge I wouldn't describe as anything close to sexy. However, there are those of you out there that will ogle over this set all day...(if you must)

Whilst I accept the fact that you do not find today's artist sexy, I think that your comments are somewhat over-the-top and unfair to the girl in question. I am not a great lover of very hairy people, of either sex but I would not make such condemning remarks.  As the title to your posting says "To each his/her own", therefore a simple expression of unsuitability to your taste would have been quite sufficient.


[color="Red"]require "help.pl";[/color]

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#23 June 4th, 2005 03:31 AM

liz
Member

Re: Curious

MrPicMe wrote:

I, for one, don't find todays "Artist"sexy. Unshaven with an ass 5x more hairy than mine and what looks like a sour cream discharge I wouldn't describe as anything close to sexy. However, there are those of you out there that will ogle over this set all day...(if you must)


On behalf of all the brave women putting themselves out there, trying to express something, create art, have some fun, whatever, I just have to say I am horrifically appalled and offended by your words.  How dare you?  As I've mentioned before, it seems that the relative anonymity of the internet makes some people feel they have free range to spew cruelty and insults that they would never dare say to a woman's face.  If you don't think she's sexy, fine, but you have no right to use this forum as a space to publicly insult and hurt people.  It takes a lot of guts to put yourself out there like the women on this site do, especially those women who do not conform to the western ideal of skinny skinny blonde shaven beauty that is increasingly pervasive.  Please, choose your words more carefully in the future and remember that these are real, living, breathing, thinking *feeling* people who, regardless of your opinion of them, have every right to feel safe and accepted in the world of ISM.


"If I can't dance, I don't want to be part of your revolution."
            -Emma Goldman

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#24 June 4th, 2005 06:44 AM

trebora
Member

Re: Curious

MrPicMe wrote:

I, for one, don't find todays "Artist"sexy. Unshaven with an ass 5x more hairy than mine and what looks like a sour cream discharge I wouldn't describe as anything close to sexy. However, there are those of you out there that will ogle over this set all day...(if you must)

You know that's just bad form, wrong, malicious and a host of other not nice things.  Did you even think what the young lady would think when/if she saw your comment.  How hard would it have been to just not leave a rude comment and leave a post on top of that.

and my first thougth when I saw your comment:
If shes got 5 times more hair i suppose that means you dont have a hair on you nuts.  (okay maybe thats mean but i thought it was funny)


---
One by one, the penguins slowly steal my sanity
---

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#25 June 4th, 2005 07:00 AM

wantingscott
Member

Re: Curious

wink

in my teen years, we would refer to that beautiful whiteness as "the sauce", and i would crave to get my tongue up-in-there... that meant she was really turned on...


_________________________________________________
that's the way it goes. but don't forget, it goes the other way too.

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